9-5-08 Week 2 Open Thread

[PhilipNelsonFan]

South Carolina choked away the game against Vanderbilt last night, leaving a perfect segue into these games (now with bonus haiku!):

Navy @ Ball State (Fri., 7 p.m. Eastern, ESPN)

Who likes running plays?
Who likes passing offenses?
First to 80 wins.

Ohio @ No. 3 Ohio State (Noon ET)

They won't, but why not
Put Ic on suicide watch
In case Bobcats win

Marshall @ No. 11 Wisconsin (Noon ET)

We are...gonna lose.
P.J. Hill runs faster than
Bret's hairline recedes.

Eastern Illinois @ No. 24 Illinois (Noon ET)

This will not be close.
But EIU still kicks ass
In women's rugby.

Georgia Tech @ Boston College (Noon ET)

This will be hyped, but
Spelling "Jagodzinski"'s hard
And we won't learn much.

Southern Miss @ No. 9 Auburn (12:30 ET)

Favre's alma mater
Tries on brand new Fedora.
Caution: Auburn Burns.

San Jose State @ Nebraska (12:30 ET)

ESPN will
Look into this game for all
Three yards and dust clouds.

No. 15 BYU @ Washington (3:10 ET)

Huskies bad at math:
Jake Locker equals offense.
Mormons never trail.

Central Michigan @ No. 2 Georgia (3:30 ET)

Trail of Tears begins
As Chippewas board bus home.
Can't afford a plane.

Cincinnati @ No. 4 Oklahoma (3:30 ET, ABC)

Over-under on
Number of D-linemen Phil
Loadholt will eat: Six.

Oregon State @ No. 19 Penn State (3:30 ET, ABC)

Beavers just got waxed
At Stanford Stadium; now
Hot for namesake field.

Mississippi @ No. 20 Wake Forest (3:30 ET, ABC)

YO YO YO FOOTBAW!!!!
Orgeron gone, Skinner clothed;
Blogosphere still weeps.

Utah State @ No. 18 Oregon (3:37 ET)

Bellotti invites
Everyone to play Aggies;
How strong is your arm?

No. 8 West Virginia @ East Carolina (4:30 ET, ESPN)

One bet is for sure:
Lou Holtz is unable to
Pronounce both schools' names.

Western Kentucky @ Eastern Kentucky (6:00 ET)

Bluegrass State Showdown!
Break out your finest 'shine and
Cleanest overalls

SE Missouri State @ No. 6 Missouri (7:00 ET)

Isn't that the team
With LB Bobby Boucher?
Daniel, Meaney romp.

Tulane @ No. 13 Alabama (7:00 ET)

Julio Jones comes through
As Tide fans ask tough questions:
He here legally?

No. 17 South Florida @ UCF (7:00 ET, ESPN2)

South Florida shows
UCF you can't spell "edge"
Without G-E-D.

Northwest @ Duke (7:00 ET)

You won't care, but still
Congratulate your new boss
On Monday morning.

Louisiana Tech @ No. 14 Kansas (7:10 ET)

Early prediction:
La. Tech's total yardage is
Less than Mark's waistline.

Miami (FL) @ No. 5 Florida (8:00 ET), ESPN

What's your name? Rob Marve.
What you do? Suck really hard.
'Canes gon' get mudded.

UNLV @ No. 22 Utah (8:06 ET)

Utes squeaked by DickRod,
UNLV's jerseys blow.
Worst game with ranked team.

No. 12 Texas Tech @ Nevada (9:05 ET)

Questionable move?
Mike Leach just gave his defense
Saturday night off.

Stanford @ No. 15 Arizona State (10:07 ET)

Rudy, patriot;
Osaisai can you see? All
The deep bombs in flight.

No. 10 Texas @ UTEP (10:15 ET, ESPN2)

Sweet debauchery.
Rice makes it rain on them hos,
Houston drinks, drives...plays?

[Da Schwab]

That CMU/Georgia haiku is priceless.

[KingInExile]

I wish I could feel better about the OSU/Penn St. game. But I will watch anyway (with a gallon of whiskey).

[A.J.]

Imma make the Game of the week thread which is Miami vs Florida.

[CJ_18]

Miami ain't gonna get 'mudded'

[A.J.]

Lets go Texas...Finally we play on TV.

I feel sorry for UTEP if Colt McCoy played like last game.

[Icness]

Gambling lock o' the week:
Texas -34.5 over UTEP. UTEP gave up 42 points to Buffalo, a team that in all seriousness I could walk onto right now as a 35-year old who hasn't strapped pads on in 17 years and still be their 2nd string TE. The line has gone up .5 every day, a sign that all the money is on Texas. It's there for a reason.

Ohio State should rough up my Bobcats, but my beloved alma mater has covered in 8 of their last 10 games against Big 10 schools, including vs. OSU.

I got Florida 56-17 over Miami. Statement game.

Nice haikus my friend!

[GYBE]

"Notre Dame football: We have to be better this year, right?"

[Icness]

End of the 1st Q and Ohio State only leads 3-0 and has zero offense. My Bobcats are playing very strong, dominating the lines of scrimmage. The INT that Wilson made that set up the FG was an amazing play.

OU starting QB out, and Malcolm Jenkins picks off the 1st pass of the new guy. And there it goes...

[Da Schwab]

Marshall is up 14-0 on the Badgers right now. Why does it take so long for that offense to get going?

[meatball sub]

Miami OH's kicker is on steroids. He's had punts of 54, 56 and 74 yards!

[meatball sub]

7-3 Ohio?

[SportsWorld]

The Big Ten is awful. Miami (OH) still in it against Michigan, Marshall beating Wisconsin, Ohio beating Ohio State, Eastern Illinois had an early lead over Illinois. Wow just wow.

[deeney0]

Wisconsin is up now. Not time to worry yet. That's next week.

[Da Schwab]

Next week's the trip to Fresno, right?

[SportsWorld]

TD Ohio on a bad snap.
14-6 Ohio.

[meatball sub]

Holy ****! Ohio State fumbled in his own endzone and Ohio recovers...

14-6 O-H-I-O

[magicfan4life05]

uuhh ohhhh


OSU might be in a lil bit of trouble

[meatball sub]

Michigan needs to post a sign up sheet for open QB try outs, these **** guys sucks ass.

[SportsWorld]

Wow he misses the extra point. That could be a huge play in this game.