9-5-08 Week 2 Open Thread
Posted: Fri Sep 5, 2008 7:02 pm
South Carolina choked away the game against Vanderbilt last night, leaving a perfect segue into these games (now with bonus haiku!):
Navy @ Ball State (Fri., 7 p.m. Eastern, ESPN)
Who likes running plays?
Who likes passing offenses?
First to 80 wins.
Ohio @ No. 3 Ohio State (Noon ET)
They won't, but why not
Put Ic on suicide watch
In case Bobcats win
Marshall @ No. 11 Wisconsin (Noon ET)
We are...gonna lose.
P.J. Hill runs faster than
Bret's hairline recedes.
Eastern Illinois @ No. 24 Illinois (Noon ET)
This will not be close.
But EIU still kicks ass
In women's rugby.
Georgia Tech @ Boston College (Noon ET)
This will be hyped, but
Spelling "Jagodzinski"'s hard
And we won't learn much.
Southern Miss @ No. 9 Auburn (12:30 ET)
Favre's alma mater
Tries on brand new Fedora.
Caution: Auburn Burns.
San Jose State @ Nebraska (12:30 ET)
ESPN will
Look into this game for all
Three yards and dust clouds.
No. 15 BYU @ Washington (3:10 ET)
Huskies bad at math:
Jake Locker equals offense.
Mormons never trail.
Central Michigan @ No. 2 Georgia (3:30 ET)
Trail of Tears begins
As Chippewas board bus home.
Can't afford a plane.
Cincinnati @ No. 4 Oklahoma (3:30 ET, ABC)
Over-under on
Number of D-linemen Phil
Loadholt will eat: Six.
Oregon State @ No. 19 Penn State (3:30 ET, ABC)
Beavers just got waxed
At Stanford Stadium; now
Hot for namesake field.
Mississippi @ No. 20 Wake Forest (3:30 ET, ABC)
YO YO YO FOOTBAW!!!!
Orgeron gone, Skinner clothed;
Blogosphere still weeps.
Utah State @ No. 18 Oregon (3:37 ET)
Bellotti invites
Everyone to play Aggies;
How strong is your arm?
No. 8 West Virginia @ East Carolina (4:30 ET, ESPN)
One bet is for sure:
Lou Holtz is unable to
Pronounce both schools' names.
Western Kentucky @ Eastern Kentucky (6:00 ET)
Bluegrass State Showdown!
Break out your finest 'shine and
Cleanest overalls
SE Missouri State @ No. 6 Missouri (7:00 ET)
Isn't that the team
With LB Bobby Boucher?
Daniel, Meaney romp.
Tulane @ No. 13 Alabama (7:00 ET)
Julio Jones comes through
As Tide fans ask tough questions:
He here legally?
No. 17 South Florida @ UCF (7:00 ET, ESPN2)
South Florida shows
UCF you can't spell "edge"
Without G-E-D.
Northwest @ Duke (7:00 ET)
You won't care, but still
Congratulate your new boss
On Monday morning.
Louisiana Tech @ No. 14 Kansas (7:10 ET)
Early prediction:
La. Tech's total yardage is
Less than Mark's waistline.
Miami (FL) @ No. 5 Florida (8:00 ET), ESPN
What's your name? Rob Marve.
What you do? Suck really hard.
'Canes gon' get mudded.
UNLV @ No. 22 Utah (8:06 ET)
Utes squeaked by DickRod,
UNLV's jerseys blow.
Worst game with ranked team.
No. 12 Texas Tech @ Nevada (9:05 ET)
Questionable move?
Mike Leach just gave his defense
Saturday night off.
Stanford @ No. 15 Arizona State (10:07 ET)
Rudy, patriot;
Osaisai can you see? All
The deep bombs in flight.
No. 10 Texas @ UTEP (10:15 ET, ESPN2)
Sweet debauchery.
Rice makes it rain on them hos,
Houston drinks, drives...plays?
Navy @ Ball State (Fri., 7 p.m. Eastern, ESPN)
Who likes running plays?
Who likes passing offenses?
First to 80 wins.
Ohio @ No. 3 Ohio State (Noon ET)
They won't, but why not
Put Ic on suicide watch
In case Bobcats win
Marshall @ No. 11 Wisconsin (Noon ET)
We are...gonna lose.
P.J. Hill runs faster than
Bret's hairline recedes.
Eastern Illinois @ No. 24 Illinois (Noon ET)
This will not be close.
But EIU still kicks ass
In women's rugby.
Georgia Tech @ Boston College (Noon ET)
This will be hyped, but
Spelling "Jagodzinski"'s hard
And we won't learn much.
Southern Miss @ No. 9 Auburn (12:30 ET)
Favre's alma mater
Tries on brand new Fedora.
Caution: Auburn Burns.
San Jose State @ Nebraska (12:30 ET)
ESPN will
Look into this game for all
Three yards and dust clouds.
No. 15 BYU @ Washington (3:10 ET)
Huskies bad at math:
Jake Locker equals offense.
Mormons never trail.
Central Michigan @ No. 2 Georgia (3:30 ET)
Trail of Tears begins
As Chippewas board bus home.
Can't afford a plane.
Cincinnati @ No. 4 Oklahoma (3:30 ET, ABC)
Over-under on
Number of D-linemen Phil
Loadholt will eat: Six.
Oregon State @ No. 19 Penn State (3:30 ET, ABC)
Beavers just got waxed
At Stanford Stadium; now
Hot for namesake field.
Mississippi @ No. 20 Wake Forest (3:30 ET, ABC)
YO YO YO FOOTBAW!!!!
Orgeron gone, Skinner clothed;
Blogosphere still weeps.
Utah State @ No. 18 Oregon (3:37 ET)
Bellotti invites
Everyone to play Aggies;
How strong is your arm?
No. 8 West Virginia @ East Carolina (4:30 ET, ESPN)
One bet is for sure:
Lou Holtz is unable to
Pronounce both schools' names.
Western Kentucky @ Eastern Kentucky (6:00 ET)
Bluegrass State Showdown!
Break out your finest 'shine and
Cleanest overalls
SE Missouri State @ No. 6 Missouri (7:00 ET)
Isn't that the team
With LB Bobby Boucher?
Daniel, Meaney romp.
Tulane @ No. 13 Alabama (7:00 ET)
Julio Jones comes through
As Tide fans ask tough questions:
He here legally?
No. 17 South Florida @ UCF (7:00 ET, ESPN2)
South Florida shows
UCF you can't spell "edge"
Without G-E-D.
Northwest @ Duke (7:00 ET)
You won't care, but still
Congratulate your new boss
On Monday morning.
Louisiana Tech @ No. 14 Kansas (7:10 ET)
Early prediction:
La. Tech's total yardage is
Less than Mark's waistline.
Miami (FL) @ No. 5 Florida (8:00 ET), ESPN
What's your name? Rob Marve.
What you do? Suck really hard.
'Canes gon' get mudded.
UNLV @ No. 22 Utah (8:06 ET)
Utes squeaked by DickRod,
UNLV's jerseys blow.
Worst game with ranked team.
No. 12 Texas Tech @ Nevada (9:05 ET)
Questionable move?
Mike Leach just gave his defense
Saturday night off.
Stanford @ No. 15 Arizona State (10:07 ET)
Rudy, patriot;
Osaisai can you see? All
The deep bombs in flight.
No. 10 Texas @ UTEP (10:15 ET, ESPN2)
Sweet debauchery.
Rice makes it rain on them hos,
Houston drinks, drives...plays?