Re: My son: advice please
Posted: Tue Mar 30, 2021 5:46 pm
Update: We switched schools and as a sophomore he started for the Varsity team and being ranked 2nd team all league!
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Nbabrothers wrote:Hi Realgm, I have a topic regarding basketball but it is for advice that I am seeking. My son who is 15 years old is an elite point guard who plays for his freshman high school team. He’s played for the third ranked national team of the 11U NYC Gauchos, 12U and was the starting point guard for the 13U Gauchos. He was also the starting point guard for the NJ ShoreShots 14U team.
For some weird reason, the coach has him coming off the bench as either the 6th or 7th man. His confidence has been shattered by this coach because if he makes one mistake he gets benched. He is better than three of the starters and that’s not just because I’m his father but because he truly is better.
My wife and son both don’t want me talking to the coach regarding how he is not developing my son to be successful and he’s so nervous of screwing up on the court. He’s never come off the bench before. I know this is probably not the place to be asking for help but I have run out of resources. Please advise and I thank you all in advance and apologize if I’m not supposed to post anything like this.
We were counting on him getting a scholarship from a D1 or D2 school but the chances of him getting noticed as a bench player makes it highly unlikely. He’s an elite defender, can shoot the three, likes contact in the paint and can drive and make the basket with defense on him and is an exceptional point guard and finds the right players to pass the back to in their favorite spots on the court.
Again I thank you for any advice you can share.
To play devils advocate, at 15 he has to be on college radars, very short window between 15 and college admissions.Pacers_Freak wrote:Nbabrothers wrote:Hi Realgm, I have a topic regarding basketball but it is for advice that I am seeking. My son who is 15 years old is an elite point guard who plays for his freshman high school team. He’s played for the third ranked national team of the 11U NYC Gauchos, 12U and was the starting point guard for the 13U Gauchos. He was also the starting point guard for the NJ ShoreShots 14U team.
For some weird reason, the coach has him coming off the bench as either the 6th or 7th man. His confidence has been shattered by this coach because if he makes one mistake he gets benched. He is better than three of the starters and that’s not just because I’m his father but because he truly is better.
My wife and son both don’t want me talking to the coach regarding how he is not developing my son to be successful and he’s so nervous of screwing up on the court. He’s never come off the bench before. I know this is probably not the place to be asking for help but I have run out of resources. Please advise and I thank you all in advance and apologize if I’m not supposed to post anything like this.
We were counting on him getting a scholarship from a D1 or D2 school but the chances of him getting noticed as a bench player makes it highly unlikely. He’s an elite defender, can shoot the three, likes contact in the paint and can drive and make the basket with defense on him and is an exceptional point guard and finds the right players to pass the back to in their favorite spots on the court.
Again I thank you for any advice you can share.
Your son is 15. Let him continue to improve his game. Scholarships should not be a concern of you or his at this point. He's 15. You talking about scholarships this early puts pressure on him. I know that is not your intention. He's 15. Let him relax and play ball. Everything else will take care of itself.
Nbabrothers wrote:file:///var/mobile/Library/SMS/Attachments/14/04/D450188C-3D3B-46E5-843A-2943684F0467/Screenshot%202021-08-28%20at%201.26.39%20PM.png
Nbabrothers wrote:Update: We switched schools and as a sophomore he started for the Varsity team and being ranked 2nd team all league!
chickenstew wrote:You are focusing on the wrong things if you are worried about what level he is playing at. Primary goal should be to get as much of his education paid for as possible, to be with coaches that will love on him and help him succeed (not all will do that) and that he has a positive college experience. I’ve seen the pressures of college basketball crush kids, the lack of playing time, mentally abusive coaches, hyper criticisms from fans. Find the most positive experience possible for your son and get some schooling paid for and he will be far ahead in life. If your goals are anything other than that? You are doing things incorrectly.
It really drives me nuts when I see these kids and parents focused on D1. Then they go and a lot don’t play, and they hate the experience and they transfer and they feel like they failed. Instead of just trying to find the best fit from the beginning.
JC has great basketball
D3 has great basketball
NAIA has great basketball
D2 has great basketball
D1 has great basketball
Find the best fit for your son.
And yes I’ve put a kid through college basketball so I know a bit about this.
He was all-state player and a state champion in high school. He had D1 opportunities but he really wanted to stay home and play for the local D2 school. The coaches at this school were very old school beat them down to putty and mold them how you want them to be types… not a lot of positivity at that program. My son tried to make it work, took a redshirt year, but the nit picking and overall negative atmosphere just wore him down and made him dread it. Many other kids felt the same way. As a redshirt sophomore he decided to transfer after 3 seasons at his local school. He took it really tough and felt like a failure.
In the portal he had other D2 schools that were interested in him but there was one NAIA school that he just clicked with the coaches. The team wasn’t even a good team! But he chose them and he hadn’t looked back.
He is absolutely loving his experience at his new school. They know how to get to him with positivity instead of negativity, they build him up. Hes enjoying helping to make his teammates better players…when my wife and I talk to him? He's smiling again. He says “my coaches will just talk to me and make sure I’m doing ok, will ask me how things are going…I’ve never experienced that before”.
And he is still getting a lot of his schooling and housing paid for and is enjoying life at an NAIA school.
Def Leppard wrote:Nbabrothers wrote:Hi Realgm, I have a topic regarding basketball but it is for advice that I am seeking. My son who is 15 years old is an elite point guard who plays for his freshman high school team. He’s played for the third ranked national team of the 11U NYC Gauchos, 12U and was the starting point guard for the 13U Gauchos. He was also the starting point guard for the NJ ShoreShots 14U team.
For some weird reason, the coach has him coming off the bench as either the 6th or 7th man. His confidence has been shattered by this coach because if he makes one mistake he gets benched. He is better than three of the starters and that’s not just because I’m his father but because he truly is better.
My wife and son both don’t want me talking to the coach regarding how he is not developing my son to be successful and he’s so nervous of screwing up on the court. He’s never come off the bench before. I know this is probably not the place to be asking for help but I have run out of resources. Please advise and I thank you all in advance and apologize if I’m not supposed to post anything like this.
We were counting on him getting a scholarship from a D1 or D2 school but the chances of him getting noticed as a bench player makes it highly unlikely. He’s an elite defender, can shoot the three, likes contact in the paint and can drive and make the basket with defense on him and is an exceptional point guard and finds the right players to pass the back to in their favorite spots on the court.
Again I thank you for any advice you can share.To play devils advocate, at 15 he has to be on college radars, very short window between 15 and college admissions.Pacers_Freak wrote:Nbabrothers wrote:Hi Realgm, I have a topic regarding basketball but it is for advice that I am seeking. My son who is 15 years old is an elite point guard who plays for his freshman high school team. He’s played for the third ranked national team of the 11U NYC Gauchos, 12U and was the starting point guard for the 13U Gauchos. He was also the starting point guard for the NJ ShoreShots 14U team.
For some weird reason, the coach has him coming off the bench as either the 6th or 7th man. His confidence has been shattered by this coach because if he makes one mistake he gets benched. He is better than three of the starters and that’s not just because I’m his father but because he truly is better.
My wife and son both don’t want me talking to the coach regarding how he is not developing my son to be successful and he’s so nervous of screwing up on the court. He’s never come off the bench before. I know this is probably not the place to be asking for help but I have run out of resources. Please advise and I thank you all in advance and apologize if I’m not supposed to post anything like this.
We were counting on him getting a scholarship from a D1 or D2 school but the chances of him getting noticed as a bench player makes it highly unlikely. He’s an elite defender, can shoot the three, likes contact in the paint and can drive and make the basket with defense on him and is an exceptional point guard and finds the right players to pass the back to in their favorite spots on the court.
Again I thank you for any advice you can share.
Your son is 15. Let him continue to improve his game. Scholarships should not be a concern of you or his at this point. He's 15. You talking about scholarships this early puts pressure on him. I know that is not your intention. He's 15. Let him relax and play ball. Everything else will take care of itself.
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